Have I ?


Photo by Ozan Safak on Unsplash

He sat on the chair, the entrance gateway behind him, so close, but yet so far. In the semi darkness, he could not make out their faces, but could sense their power. Their non human spiritual power. They sat in judgement of him now. The three with the power. The ability to save, or condemn him. Had he known in advance, how sudden he would be called, of course he would have made amends. Of course he would have been more honest, in his dealings with others. He never would have interfered with those young, at times, very ill, innocent children. They with no choices. He reasoned to himself at least, that they were all sexual beings and most probably enjoyed the experience. The fact that nobody knew about, and nobody ever would, what did it matter. It hardly mattered to anybody. That’s what he reasoned.
The cruelty he inflicted on others, why, that would never have happened. If only his life had been different, had being more fulling, more full of abundance. If only life had been more fair to him, he in turn would have been more kind and generous to others.
His fearful, pleading, explaining eyes, begging for a second chance. Funny how it was the very same look on the face of his victims, and those on the receiving end of his cruelty, and dishonesty. God listened to his pleas, and his fear.

‘I have watched your life, and how you used your time. On many occasions I sent you guidance and messages, in the form of co-incidental events, idea’s planted in your mind, and people who crossed your path’, the Lord spoke slowly.
‘ You chose to ignore the messages, that became increasingly stronger, as you veered off the path of righteous. The Devil has your soul, and that’s where you must go’.

It didn’t take long for the anger to surface. The sudden leap from the chair. The futile attempt at running at and attacking those who sat in judgement on him. The swearing. He reached for the weapon, that was usually hidden in his waistband, to find it, not there.

‘Well, had you given me a fairer life, none of this would have happened’, the anger and volume in his voice, so loud and bitter.

‘None of it, Do you hear me.’ The venom and anger coming from the very depths of his body and soul. Guttural ,and full of violent, murderous intent His face near purple with rage. Perspiration appearing on his forehead, cheeks and seeping through to dampen his dark t-shirt. His body shook as he screamed, exhausted and spent of energy.
‘ You watched, as those I trusted, took that trust and used my innocence for their own desires. Men of your own cloth among them. You must have seen. Why did you let that happen, why Lord. Why did you sit back and let that happen ? Why did you take my family from my life, at such a young age ? ‘
‘Why did you take my loving wife from my life, in that brutal way ? ‘
‘Why did you make my children turn away from me ?’

God listened but did not answer.

‘To hell with you’, again from the very depths of his soul, and body. Now physically and mentally drained.

‘No’, the Lord countered, ‘to hell with you’.

‘I took those who borne you away, to make you stronger. To give you the strength, and tools, if you choose to use them. I sent you these and other tests, to make you stronger in this life, to prepare you for the next, and as punishment for the lives you have led in your previous incarnations. I made your children turn away, because I could see your soul could not be saved. I turned them away, to save them from you. Those who used you for their own desires, will pay the price, for the chances they were given, and the bad choices they made and the lessons never learned.’ The voice of the Lord, loud, thunderous, and angry. ‘ Not the God of love, that was preached to him from his school days of so long ago.
‘ All of you must, and will pay the price for the lives you have lived, in this life, and your past incarnations. Until and unless you learn your life lessons. Their is no escape, from how you have lived. Judgement comes to all’.

‘You will now find a warm welcome at the gates of hell, for that is where you belong, my child’.

Written in response to a photo prompt seen here : https://creativewriting.ie/writing-prompts/