Approx seven ago I (foolishly…..) purchased a Windows laptop, from my local Argos store, here in Ireland, sight unseen, as they would not allow one to view it before purchase.
When I got home and unpacked the laptop, and from that first moment I never, ever liked it. Its dull grey exterior, the cheap feeling of the materials it was composed of. But I needed a 17 inch screen for a project I was working on at the time, so I had to buy it. The cost was a very hefty £600, a damn fortune seven years ago. But I went ahead anyway, convinced my latest venture was to make a fella rather wealthy than most !
Seven years on, I am slightly more financially secure, but that’s more thanks to a injury compensation claim, I was reasonably successful with. Not as much as I was expecting, but still some is better than none ! So anytime I used that windows laptop, it was soo slow to even start up, to carry out the processes necessary. It was chaotic, frustrating to the highest degree. Enough to make me want to smash the machine against the wall, after I had attacked it with a sledgehammer and set fire to it. I am sure that gives an indication of how frustrated I was with the machine, and the windows operating system in particular.
Then I discovered linux, and how I could put linux on a USB key, and start my laptop from that, which I did. Joy of joy’s. A laptop that was mile’s faster to boot up, just to work, when asked. But I not being some technically proficient computer genius, when I ran into some issues, such as downloading software, for example. Not that easy to figure out on linux, for people new to that operating system.
So anyways moving on, I later discovered Chromebooks. A system of computers that just work. Are fast to boot up. Sort themselves out for updates and all that. Great. That was fine, until I found that many downloads, or projects I was interested in, Windows was the main system they were devised for. Ok, I thought I have a Windows laptop, so I will use that. Hold fast….. not as easy as that !
Therein lies the issue. Over the past few days I had to download some software, for yet another money making project, and there supported systems in the main were Windows, and linux. The latter being quiet technical, I’ll go with my Windows machine, I said to myself, and that will be right. So I fired the computer up, and began to install the updates. Then I get a pop up on screen saying, I should update to Windows 10 to ensure security, avoid malware. Ok seems like a good idea, to update from Windows 7. This is where the problems began, and blood pressure began to rise substantially.
Then began the process to update my laptop from Windows 7 to Windows 10. It seemed so straightforward from the video I was following to online. The fella seems quiet versed in technicality and all that. So I followed along, and several hours later Windows 10 had not downloaded as seen in the video. So tired I switched the computer off and went to bed, assured in myself I would sort it out no bother next morning, after a night’s sleep.
How wrong can a person be ? So I switched on the laptop, and was happy to see the Windows 10 icon appear on screen. Truly I am I genius, I agreed to myself. I congratulate myself, and eagerly awaited the appearance of my new Windows 10 installation.
So the Windows icon was accompanied by a spinning circular disk, never a good sign ! That went on for some minutes, and then some more minutes, and then nothing. No fire up, no new Windows 10 installation. Many, many hours later, after much reading I had not done in a very long time about the inability of Windows 10 to load I just gave up, defeated, frustrated, angry, and somewhat depressed. This was after all a £600 laptop that was as useful as a dead cat.
I read so many articles about this issue, and tried so very many proposed solutions. Yet absolutely nothing whatsoever worked. I was meeting roadblocks at every turn. It was unbelievable really. Was life trying to tell me something. Was this next money making project I was contemplating nothing but a dead end, and a waste of time ?
I tried Sfc/scannow, that didn’t not work. We found corrupted issues we could not fix, they say. More reading, try Dism they said. Tried it, error 05, error 50. That would not work either. Blood pressure raising, depression increasing. It’s not looking good for the computer, nor myself. Forty winks should sort it out, I reckoned. So I did that, came back to it, although not feeling fully confident in the likelihood of success at this juncture.
More reading, more attempts on the laptop for Windows 10 to repair itself. to reset itself. No, we could not do that either the laptop responded, to the later. How about trying a restore point, I quirred. No, the laptop responded , ‘We cannot find any restore point’. But I nominated a restore point within the last hour I protested, but the laptop did not respond.
Blood pressure rising. Hopelessness and depression setting in. I can feel the tension on my body, the clenched jaw, my gentle guitar playing hands turning into fists of anger and extreme wrath. Is this the way I want to be, I asked of myself. The swearing in my mind. Deciding how I would torture BIll Gates if ever I could get my hands on him. Trying out different torture method in my mind to use on said Mr Gates, and if not possible to actually meet him, wishing him a very painful and long drawn out death with much suffering. I very briefly questioned my mental sanity after such thoughts, but assured myself that it was a very legitimate response and quiet sane.
So absolutely fed up of trying to sort this out, I made a decision that had begun to rumble in my mind over the last 36 hours I had being trying to resolve this issue. The destruction and annihilation of the laptop by my own hand. A £600 laptop about to be destroyed ? I wrestled with this, but I also wrestled with my frustration, my anger, my heightened blood pressure, my sense of inadequacy, my frustration, such that must be unknown to any man on earth.
That was it. I decided this frustrating Windows laptop had to go, and go by my own hand was the only solution to ease my anger, frustration, my heightened blood pressure. Today, now at the end of my teather, I wipped the plug from the wall in my study, searched within my assorted toolbox and retrieved the safety glasses I knew I would need, just in case any of the debri I was about to create were to enter into my eyes. How angry would I be then with Bill Gates ?
With the unplugged 17 inch Windows laptop I hurried to the the garage of my home, which had a variety of tools accumulated from over many years. I knew what I required, a sledge hammer of heavy weight, or similar. Unable to see the former I happened upon a rolled steel solid spear like apparatus. A healthy 5 foot in height. Sharpe at the point, but manly, satisfactorily heavy enough to do substantial damage. Happy with my choice, with some effort I lifted the heavy steel sharp edged spear, and exited the garage with the offensive Windows laptop and spear under my arm’s
Around to the back garden, no one in sight, how lucky am I ? I laid my offensive steel spear against an obliging wall, and lifted the laptop above my head and slammed it down a few times on some sharp edged rocks the garden conveniently supplied. What will the neighbours think ? I question in my mind, of this lunatic next door. To hell with them, I dont care no more. Where was the release I was expecting ? Where was the relaxation I was expecting ? Nowhere, that’s where. I concluded the sharp rocks I was smashing the Windows laptop against repeatedly, although they were unmoved, and never said, they were gaining most of the satisfaction from the destruction of the laptop, not I.
Can’t have that I said. I placed the laptop upon the the grass and muck just in front of the angry rocks. Moved to the back wall where my spear rested peacefully, and lifted it up. Comforted by it’s heaviness and strength, assured within my mind it would do a substantial amount of damage on my intended victim. Excitement began to bubble within my body. Grasping the rolled steel spear, I raised it above my head, with difficulty, mind, as it was quiet heavy, and it was some time since I had done much in the way of physical exertions. But the memory of my recent anger, frustration and despair much to the fore in my mind and body, it was very easy to access such powerful emotions and use them, to empower my body and consequently the steel spear with the anger and vengeance I felt coursing throughout my body.
Repeatedly I raised the spear above my head and brought it crashing down upon the Windows laptop, again and again. With every blow I struck I could feel the anger, and frustration trapped in my body over the last 36 hours be released. Watching as the the spear pierced the cheap plastic and steel components of the laptop. My frustration and despair of the last 36 hours, being replaced by a feeling of calmness, tranquility and a a sense that a wrong had being righted.
Twenty minutes later I’m done. Computer satisfactorily smashed to smithereens. To hell with you Bill Gates, and the Windows operating system. To hell with you all. My body is now relaxed, my mind calm as I put the remains of the now very smashed up computer into the bin, where it absolutely belongs, and long may it stay.
My equilibrium is returning. My hate filled thoughts are agan in remission. All is good with the world.
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